Boston College psychologist and researcher, Peter Gray uses the following four characteristics to identify play in “#2 What Exactly is Play? “.
According to Gray, play is…
self-chosen & self-directed
intrinsically motivated, the means are more than the ends
guided by mental rules or concepts invented or adopted
always create and usually imaginative
The first two characteristics led me to ask “What is the ‘why’ behind my playing?” Self-chosen, self-directed, and intrinsically motivated are characteristics that come from within oneself. This means one’s why is unique for each musician.
I have been thinking a lot about my ‘why’ to realize I have been at a loss to answer it. I discovered that dissonance between what I thought a flutist “should do/be” and what I wanted to do is the root of this discomfort.
For one thing, the parameters for a music career have exploded over the last 20 years. Today there are infinite opportunities and possibilities. When I left the Cincinnati College-Conservatory of Music I saw the black-and-white options, orchestral job, teaching job, or failure as a musician. I also saw things as good or bad, there was no in-between. I didn’t fit in! The result was a lot of self-doubt and frustration.
I am uncovering my 2024 ‘why’ for playing. I know I LOVE creating sound with my flute. I especially love experimentation with unique sounds that are a part of the music of today. This informs my teaching but can also inspire my playing.
Knowing my 2024 why helps me to select repertory that is meaningful to me. Doing this allows me to share my authentic ideas. I can also use this to explore and perform repertoire from earlier periods rather than playing a piece because it is a standard.
I hope I sparked something in you. I invite you to share your unique ‘why’. Perhaps collectively sharing will help inspire those who are unsure to identify their why.
Be curious.